Should I Stay or Should I Go?: My Atheism Is Making Me and My Son Homeless

I don’t know, man. I’m starting to believe strangers on the corner would treat me better than my “family“.

wg

June 15, 2013 (my son just turned two on the 14th), I got into an argument with – wait, let me start from the beginning…

I’m staying with a relative long enough to get back on my feet. I made it clear to this relative that I’m not planning on staying here too much longer – seeing as I hate it here. Moving back into my childhood home; where I was neglected, abused, molested and used was the last thing I wanted to do, but it beats having me and my 2-year-old son out on the street. Trust me, if I had somewhere else to go, I would have taken that, anything would have been better than moving here.

I’m currently in school, but I’m out of work at the moment and for some reason, no matter how many job offers I apply to, or the amount of job applications I fill out and send, no one wants to hire me. I have to stay optimistic because I’m not about to spend another 6-months in this hell-hole. Moving on…

Anyway, I got into an argument with my grandmother about the bullshit she was telling people about me and all the lies she was telling them. She even set me up, telling me things about my own relatives that weren’t true and they were supposedly in on it to see what I would do about it. What kind of family does this? Then again, this is the same family that told me that someone is out to hurt me but they wouldn’t tell me who.

This argument wasn’t about religion in the slightest. My relative made low-blows on my personality, my character and tried to embarrass me in front of the very same relatives that are against me. To me, she only embarrassed herself. This relative brought up my past a lot and took jabs at my son. Then she decided to go lower than that and tell me she doesn’t trust me as well to tell me she doesn’t like that I’m an atheist. I simply told her that it’s my life and my choice. What triggered this low and petty blow was one word: goddamn. Yep, I was talking to one of the other relatives in the room and this holier-than a communion wafer screams “I won’t take you taking the lord’s name in vain in my house!” I almost laughed but I ended up looking at her like she had two heads.

I was speechless! This is the same woman who would sell you out, and get you jumped by some unknown person – mind you, this mystery person that was going to hurt me, never surfaced yet. So we argue some more and she simply says well you have a month to find somewhere to say because I don’t like your atheism in my house”. So I confirmed what I said earlier to her: “I know more about your bible than you do”…I think that pissed her off.

But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
1 Timothy 5:8

If someone’s religion was so sure, so great; what I say in vain shouldn’t matter. To kick me out because I said “goddamn” sounds like to me she was finding an excuse to even bring up my atheism.

My fans of the Facebook page told me that I should just lie and say she shown me the light to keep from being out on the streets. I don’t know how I feel about lying about that. I’ve never been known to bite my tongue or kiss anyone’s ass, I feel that it would be beneath me to start now. I was also told to respect my elders and their religion. I’m sorry, what? Respect is earned! Furthermore, I’m not going to respect a religion that enslaved a people – which are still slaves to that imaginary sky-daddy today.

Her reasoning to hold strong to her sky-daddy’s nuts? Her 45 surgeries and doctors telling her she won’t make it to see 18. She didn’t stop there. She then went on to say I’m not working and out of a place to stay because I’m an atheist. All I have to say is, if that’s all god can do to me then he’s a fucking idiot.

I’m not about to lie, I’m not about to kiss anyone’s ass to keep from hurting their feelings. Their feelings wouldn’t get hurt if they didn’t have such foolish beliefs.

Once I’m out of here, they’ll never hear or see from me or my son again. To kick me out, that’s fine, but to kick out my 2-year-old son because I’m not a sheep? That’s the lowest of the low. Fuck em’.

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8 comments

  1. There is no rule in atheism about lying. There is a common feeling that we provide for ourselves as best we can. If you have to lie a bit for a month or two nobody will blame you if it keeps you housed and fed. We’ve all had to lie to get through for the same reasons. No, you should not have to and I’m not telling you that it is the best course of action. I’m saying that nobody will blame you. You’ve already walked away from them mentally… for what they do and are.

    Do what is necessary to get to the next place, the next point. I wouldn’t look back either. Do what it takes to go… sometimes that means pretending. I feel for you. Survival requires dishonesty in your case it would seem. You already know you are alone. Nobody protects your child but you.

    I would happily donate to a paypal account to help you get to the next place. I do not know why you are getting no positive reaction to your job search, but I know it happens. In my life I have found that this is the situation type where you have to be the angel despite what others are doing. Endure, suffer, get by… not what you deserve, but what must be done to get beyond it. I wish you much fortune. Know that there are people in the world that do not want you to suffer. Where you are now is not the only place… there are better places.

    If there are other atheists and humanists who read this and do not want to donate a few dollars to help, I’d like to know why…

    Like

  2. Reblogged this on myatheistlife and commented:
    There is no rule in atheism about lying. There is a common feeling that we provide for ourselves as best we can. If you have to lie a bit for a month or two nobody will blame you if it keeps you housed and fed. We’ve all had to lie to get through for the same reasons. No, you should not have to and I’m not telling you that it is the best course of action. I’m saying that nobody will blame you. You’ve already walked away from them mentally… for what they do and are.

    Do what is necessary to get to the next place, the next point. I wouldn’t look back either. Do what it takes to go… sometimes that means pretending. I feel for you. Survival requires dishonesty in your case it would seem. You already know you are alone. Nobody protects your child but you.

    I would happily donate to a paypal account to help you get to the next place. I do not know why you are getting no positive reaction to your job search, but I know it happens. In my life I have found that this is the situation type where you have to be the angel despite what others are doing. Endure, suffer, get by… not what you deserve, but what must be done to get beyond it. I wish you much fortune. Know that there are people in the world that do not want you to suffer. Where you are now is not the only place… there are better places.

    If there are other atheists and humanists who read this and do not want to donate a few dollars to help, I’d like to know why…

    Like

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